Okay here it is, but i refuse to make any apologies for this one coz thats how i was feeling at the time, i still love you though and all i need is your word to make it better. Friends?

I wish we could forget we are mad

I wish we could go back to whatever meaningless thing it was that made us fight

I wish we could ignore the things i said

Or that you hurt me too

I wish we could take back the mean words

We both exchanged

I wish we could erase the moment i broke down in tears

Screaming of the break in my heart

You had just delivered

Or more the one in yours

I swore wasn't my fault

I wish i could erase her

All her memories of you and me

The smell of her on your sheets

Her hair in my brush

Her kiss on your lips

I wish you could still tell me

That we are soulmates

I wish your dreams

Still incuded me

I wish that all that mattered was

The kissing and Hugging and

The "I love you's"

That were spoken

As we melted into each others eyes

But more than anything

I wish, after all,

That you would still be my best friend

I want things to go back to the way they once were but you can't rebuild what you and her demolished, i can't go to your work things knowing she is gonna be there, and really i do admire your courage in telling me, but i can't pretend it didn't happen.

Thankyou for being my best friend and my toyboy but i can't continue the latter without feeling like i can't give you everything you need, coz if i could it wouldn't have happened, would it?

I still wanna be best friends coz, you do mean the world to me.

Sorry to everyone else who doesn't know what i am talking about, i hope you enjoyed my craptastic english poetry!

 You know this is for you but i am so not into internet fighting, see why i didn't want you to read it in the car, it is a stupid poem and i had to write it,

To cry over your cruelty

Or to shout back

To make my pain

Feel better than yours

You know how to pick

That iron sting

That vibrates my trust

Don't make me colour you angry

When i look back

On the portrait of my youth

My resentment corrodes into my heart

Filling it with spite

That fire drives me

To disappoint you

You know i'm not an angel

Because you ripped off those wings

A long time ago

With the first blow up

But you still continue the abuse

Through your violent tongue

Its too late, I've given up

On shattered dreams and

lifeless wings

Sailing on tears

Between us an ocean

And i know i was a bit harsh i mean it was one stupid fight and you haven't seen the other one and maybe if you behave i might post it! If its any consolation you got me good marks!

OMG

I am so so sick of driving!

My car broke down on thursday night, well not really broke down but... Okay i was being exceptionally responsible and ran out of petrol. So i spent two hours on the side of the road at ten o'clock at night, i was so so dying to go to the bathroom - i wasconsidering legging it down to the underpass but the idea of an NRMA man catching me with my pants down was mortifying. So i sat and waited instead.

The NRMA man finally got there and i climbed out of my little beast and into the freezing cold - not that it was much warmer inside. I was wearing my trackie dacks and a wife beater - not the most flattering of outfits but hey i was comfortable.

Not only did the NRMA man arrive but he was so so damn fine! I was looking like the biggest tool in the whole wide world, not just physically but i had run out of pertrol so i wasn't scoring many intellectual points either.

Anyway to cut a long story short, i ended up getting hhis phone number "for future emergencies" and he so nicely said that "future emergencies also include have nothing to do on a friday night". YES PLEASE!

On sunday i went to go down to the shops and my car wouldn't start, so i did what any mentally sane person would do and kickedthe tyre, went in and called the NRMA. i didn't call my NRMA man coz i didn't want him to think  was calling just for the car so i just rang the company, went inside and waited around.

The NRMA arrived and i went to open the door nd who should i see but the NRMA man form the other night!!! Shame, but he ended up replacing the battery, and coming in for a drink. Best couple of hundred bucks i have ever spent!

So this friday i have plans with the NRMA man, i will never fill up the car again if it means calling out the hot NRMA men!!!

I got to thinking the other day, about bullshit rumours. I mean how do people really deal with some of the things other people say about them, true or untrue? This occured to me while at the Brumbies vs Cheifs Rugby Union match. An old friend of mine (lets just call him B) always promised me a full rugby tutorial, being a league girl i had no idea about anything union related. My friend and i had a falling out and i never got that tutorial.

So trying the whole feminist i don't need him anyway train of thought, my cousin, a friend from work and i trekked out to the last Brumbies homegame. The three girls raided the bar stocked up on smernoff and using our powers of persuasion, not to mention our "assets" scored ourselves front row seats courtesy of a large group of grammar boys.

Whileon my way to the bar to get another round of drinks i ran into the whole group of B's mates. Carrying  a tray of about eight beers i stopped to have a quick chat. the outcome of which was "wow Catio you are looking great, it must be the pregnancy hormones. When are you and B due?"

Quick bit of background info, i never slept with B we were always just mates. For awhile B was my best friend and the only person i totally trusted. but after a night out we ended up going back to his place and hooked up. Total truth - it was what i wanted at the time but when i decided i didn't want to go any further with him, and he said he thought we shouldn't have jepodiased our friendship and promptly stopped talking to me. I soon got over it and tried to talk to him about resuming our friendship but he decided he would take the mature approach and cancel my calls not returnmy messages and ignore me whenever i saw him.

As it turns out the reason he has decided to cease communication was because he thought i had told one of my best friends i was pregnant with his child. this friend who we will call S was once described by B as being "dirty" and quote " i don't understand what other guys see in her, i couldn't ever go with someone who had gotten with my whole school."

S and B are now an item.

I don't know whether they actually teach sex ed at Marist but could B actually believe thatt i was pregnant with his immaculate conception? He also recruited one of his mates to find out whether or not the baby is his.

The funniest thing about the whole episode is that i am not pregnant,  i didn't sleep with him and contrary to popular belief i will not be demanding child support payments.

Does anyone else have stories like this, or can anyone confirm for me that you actually have to sleep with someone to be carrying their baby?